Alexa Bliss should dump Buddy Murphy for me and here’s a few reasons why:
- Buddy Murphy was an NXT tag team champ. That’s cool, but I have a podcast with at least 5 listeners. Easy win for me.
- Buddy Murphy has a good body, ok good for him, but i have a mid-sized suv AND it’s a Mazda.
- So he’s got a charming Australian accent. I have a more charming Boston accent, I’m the clear winner again.
- Buddy Murphy does a running brain buster as a finishing move… hmm I can’t compete with that, that’s fucking awesome. Although I’ve never seen him win so I’m taking the win on this one too.
- Alexa loves dogs and even has two. Guess who else has two, yup that’s right, I do. We’re both huge dog-lovers. Who can resist this face?
- Buddy is a dog’s name. Jesus, is that why she likes him?? That’s weird to even think about so I’m taking the win once again.
- She dresses like Harley Quinn. I am willing to wear Joker makeup if thats what she’s into. Would Buddy?? Doubtful.
- Alexa loves Disney. According to Alexa’s Instagram, Buddy just recently took his first photo with a Disney character. I did that shit when I was 4. I freaking love disney and you better believe I’ll take her to Space Mountain … it’s my favorite coaster.
- And finally, when she’s in the ring cutting a promo and she looks directly into the camera, I see the way she looks at me. Why you got to be so coy Alexa?